私たちの物語 - 嗜癖・依存症・過去ログ No.28

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■2013年05月29日水曜日 22時35分22秒

世話焼き嗜癖がある。相手の為にならないことは分かっている。やめたいけどやめられない。自分の心が寂しいんだなぁ、困ってる人や苦しんでる人を見つけると、急にうれしくなる！自分を必要としてくれるんじゃないだろうかって思ってしまう。価値のない自分が急に、必要とされる存在になるのがうれしくてうれしくてしょうがない。
　でも、相手の寂しさに侵入しても、寄り添っている状態ではないんだと教えてもらった。侵入すると相手も自分もメチャメチャになると分かった。

自分の寂しさを癒せないものは、他者の寂しさに寄り添うことができず、侵入してしまい、自分も相手もダメにするんだと勉強できた。

だが・・・実際行動に移せるかなぁ・・・心配だ・・・認知行動療法だ！

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■2013年05月25日土曜日 11時05分30秒

せっ視症の人間たちのための自助グループがあればなぁ・・・

田代まさしさんや他の同種類の嗜癖者たちが安らげる場に、自分と向き合える場になると思うんだが・・・

社会的タブーが強すぎるからなかなかできないグループかな・・・

誰かサービスする人いないかな・・・

当事者たちでできないなら、だれか初めだけでも・・・

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■2013年03月24日日曜日 21時25分01秒

草やハーブをやって改めて思った。
嗜癖や依存は快楽の為にするんじゃない。

刺激なら何でもいいんだ。
「今」を誤魔化せる為なら、気持ち悪かろうが、何だろうが。

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■2013年03月13日水曜日 18時23分35秒

約一名、このHPに極度の依存傾向の見られる人がいるが、その人は自覚していないのだろう。